The Impact of Questions in Collaborative Negotiations: How to Create Trust and Release Value

Have you ever experienced a conversation suddenly turning dry and tense after a question you have asked? Your question might have triggered a defensive reaction, similar to a "fight or flight" response, in the other person. Research in neurosciences has shown that social interaction, or what can be perceived as a social threat, can trigger the same physiological response to stress as a physical threat.

When conducting a collaborative negotiation, the aim is to create maximum value from the agreement. However, asking certain questions may result in defensive behavior from the other party. Their willingness to share information with you will decrease, limiting opportunities to create more value together. Therefore, detailed preparation will be critical to leverage more value with your counterparty, and a structured approach to planning your questions will be necessary.

Get Rid of Your Assumptions

One of the best pieces of advice I've ever received in my professional life is to always approach each meeting with a client as if it were the first time you're meeting them. This means clearing your mind of any preconceived notions or assumptions you may have about them, based on your previous interactions or knowledge of their business. By doing so, you can avoid introducing bias into your questioning and ensure that you're gathering the most accurate and complete information possible. Do not assume anything, instead ask yourself:

• What is the information you need from them?
• What will be your approach to obtaining that information?
• What level of detail do you need?
• What will be your next question if you still don’t have enough information from your initial one?

Be Ready to Share Something with Them

Are you asking questions about sensitive topics that could potentially irritate your counterparty? Make an objective assessment of the possible reluctance from their side to answer your questions. How critical or sensitive is the information that you would like to gain? Will your question be seen as a threat?

If you are seeking sensitive information that could be seen as a threat, yet it is important to unlock more value or new opportunities in a negotiation, you need to be strategic about how you approach the other party. Consider sharing some information with them first, so that they may be more inclined to share information with you in return. This can help build trust and foster a more productive negotiation.

• Think and prepare upfront what information they will need from you.
• Decide which insights and how much detail you will provide them.
• Prepare all the information you can or want to share with them.
• Be mindful to anticipate any delays you might experience from internal alignment.

Listen Carefully to Their Answers

I will always remember a deal from a couple of years ago working in the in-vitro diagnostics industry. I was visiting a private laboratory with the account manager. He was concerned as the client had a long track history of being price-driven, squeezing suppliers for the lowest price.

We started the meeting with the client and after quite informal introductions I asked, "How is the business going with the current evolving landscape?" At that time, the marketplace was under heavy consolidation and the merging of small and medium groups of private laboratories were competing to ensure they were large enough to grow and survive.

His answer was a brief overview of their activities in the geographic area in which they were doing business with the dynamics of the different players. By listening carefully to his answer, I understood that he was seeking financial support for his business growth and therefore needed more assets to secure new loans from banks to finance his external growth.

Clarifying Questions that Deepen Understanding

Our understanding of the situation led us to propose a capital investment in in-vitro diagnostics equipment that was 56% above our standard prices. We gave the client a couple of days to consider the proposal. 

The account manager was anticipating a difficult call from the business owner, as they were expecting to negotiate on the price. However, the client surprised us by calling back to close the agreement at the proposed price, without any further discussions on the price.

• Rather than being focused on your next question or topic, which should be written in your notes for the meeting, take your time to listen carefully to what they are saying and interpret the real meaning behind the words.
• What does their answer tell you about their priorities and challenges?
• If you don’t have the full picture, ask follow-up questions or consider asking clarifying questions like, "Can you tell me more about...?" or, "What do you mean by...?”

Final Thoughts: Elevating Negotiation Through Better Questions

In business conversations, when addressing a collaborative negotiation, if the level of trust and openness between the two parties is not strong enough, you might sub-optimize the potential value of your agreement. An appropriate amount of time should be dedicated to preparing your questions and information to be shared with your counterparty.

Be ready to explore and share to gain more insights. And importantly, be ready to listen to them! Understanding what they have in mind will give you keys to negotiate with them.

Vincent Guillard is an experienced negotiation specialist and business strategist currently serving as Manager & Client Director at The Gap Partnership in France. With over five years at the firm, Vincent has significantly contributed to the organization's growth and client satisfaction through his expertise in collaborative negotiations and strategic client management.